Listen To Your Heart
by writingtiger
Summary: my first attempt at a song fic, and it just kind of exploded.
1. Default Chapter

I know there's something in the wake of your smile.  
  
I get a notion from the look in your eyes, yea.  
  
Margaret sat up in bed. Her breathing was shallow and raspy as she looked around the room, and took in her surroundings. The walls were sturdier than canvas, and the closest was a decent size. The alarm clock on her night table read 3:30 a.m. She was safe in America. It was the same dream again. 'There must be something to this' she thought, as she calmed down. It was the third night in a row she had had the same dream. It was she and Hawkeye in the bombed out shelter. He was kissing her just like he had then, only this time he was telling her how much he needed her, how much he loved her. She got up and started to get dressed.  
  
If there was one advantage of leaving the army, it was that she had a lot of free time as she looked for a job. A wave of nervousness hit her stomach like a tidal wave. What would she find when she hit Crabapple Cove? It had been two months since the kiss they had shared in Korea. Was it a wasted trip? She didn't even have his address, never mind his phone number. She shook her head as she started the car. This definitely proved she had lost it. The old Margaret that was sent to Korea would never have done this, not to mention without any planning or thought.  
  
Each nerve started to flutter all the more with each passing mile. What if she was making a fool of herself? Had she read into that kiss more than what actually existed? As she examined her feelings, she realized she loved Hawkeye. She certainly wouldn't be doing this if she didn't. Would he feel the same? She started to regret all those times she had put up a wall. If she had only allowed him to get closer, she wouldn't be having these questions now.  
  
She passes a sign that said "Welcome TO Maine" with a bright red lobster at the bottom. She wondered if everyone in the state loved lobster as much as Hawkeye did, or any seafood for that matter. Her heart sped up as she made her exit onto the state route that would take her right into downtown Crabapple, if there was such a thing. "I hope you know what you're doing," Margaret," she said to herself as she grew closer. She had never dreamed seeing Hawkeye would draw such a two edged sword. She wanted to see him, be hugged by him, see that smile again, and let him know exactly how she felt. Yet she hoped the journey would last forever as part of her worried it wouldn't turn out the way she wanted it to. He could have moved to another city, or worse, in with another woman.  
  
She pulled up to a little café. At the counter she asked for a Coke and a local phone book. "Who are you hoping to find honey?" Shirley, the waitress, asked. "An old army friend." "Well ain't that something. My husband Daniel's boy just returned from Korea." "Your husband Daniel? Daniel Pierce?" "Well he ain't my husband just yet. We were waiting for his boy to get home so he could be at the wedding. We're all set though to get hitched next Friday." "Congratulations," Margaret said, as she took a sip of Coke. "You wouldn't by chance know Hawkeye?" "Landsakes, he's only going to be my stepson. I don't know why I didn't put it together before. That boy is just like his daddy, always bringing the ladies." "Always?" "Say my shifts about over, and the menfolk are coming over to my house for dinner. Why don't you just come to my house a spell and you can really surprise Hawkeye."  
  
She paced back and forth on the back porch. The grandfather clock chimed the hour. IT was six. They would be here any minute now. "Stop pacing honey. Why don't you give the salad a few extra tosses? At least it'll be something productive." "I'm just really nervous. It's been so long since I've seen Hawkeye." "Don't worry honey. I know he remembers you." "Really?" "He's mentioned you once or twice?" she said with a wink. 


	2. Before YOu Tell Him Goodbye

The doorbell signaled their arrival. "Wait right here," Shirley told her, as she took off her apron, and bustled to the door. "Hi darling," she heard someone say. That had to be Hawkeye's dad. "Hi Shirley," she heard Hawkeye say. She fell in love with him all over again as she heard the teasing familiarity of his voice. She heard them walk into the dining room. "Four plates?" she heard Daniel ask. "Well we're having another guest for dinner," she explained. Margaret took a deep breath. That was her cue. She pushed open the swinging door that separated the dining room from the kitchen.

Hawkeye looked as though he was about to have a heart attack. "Margaret?" "It's me Hawkeye. He jumped up and hugged her tight. "If you would excuse us?" Hawkeye said, sweeping her out of the room. He led her out to the front porch, looking at her again before kissing her fiercely. "I can't believe you're here," he murmered, still holding her close. "I came for you," she said softly. "For me?" he asked looking at her in disbelief. "No, it's because I love driving a million miles into the middle of nowhere," she teased. They sat down on a white washed wooden swing. "I wanted to look for you, but I had no clue where to start." "I had a dream that you were looking for me." "Really?" "We should probably go back in." "You're right. How long are you planning on staying in town?" "A couple of days, at least."

"That was delicious Shirley. Thank you so much," Margaret said as she got up to help her clear the table. Gently Shirley took the plates from her. "You needn't help me clear. I know you and my future stepson have a lot to catch up on." "It's okay." "No, you children run along. I insist." Hawkeye and Margaret went obediently back out on the front porch. "When is he going to mention Teresa?" Daniel asked. "Why don't we do the dishes while we wait to find out."

"So you left the army?" Margaret nodded. "I realized that I could have the cleanliness and order without the trappings of Major or Colonel. So how about you? Have you joined your father's practice?" "Yea, the most complicated surgeries I do now are appendectomies. It's a nice change, but I miss working with you." "Really?" "I've missed everything about you, your smile, that little flash that lights up your eyes when you're mad, trying to get you for just one drink at the officers club, and that one dance, and.." "If I hadn't been so stupid, I would have taken you up on it every time," she interrupted. "I never thought I would hear you say that." "I never thought I'd hear you say you missed me. I was so horrible to you in Korea." "Not all the time. You were really nice to me that one night in the bomb shelter." "Mmm, I remember that," she said as she snuggled into him. They shared another kiss. "So where are you going to be at while you're here?" "Shirley insisted I stay here. She's like a mother hen." "She's defiantly the best choice my dad could have made after my real mom."

He put his arms tighter around her. She turned into him for another one. "I'm warning you Pierce, if you keep it up I might fall in love with you." "It's a little too late for that. I've fallen." They kept kissing, until it got too much. Hawkeye pulled away. :Margaret, as much as I want you right now, I doubt my father's fiance's porch is not the place or time." "I agree," she said trying to catch her breath. "So where have you been?" he asked. "Boston, I was thinking of working at Boston General, but I'm also looking at Bellevue in New York. I also have an offer from Cedars – Sinai." "You must have built up quite the reputation." She shrugged. "I just work hard." "You're good, and you know it. I would love to have someone even half as good as you at my clinic." "I would like to work with a doctor even half as good as you are."

"Oh, I didn't realize how much I've missed you until now," he said, engulfing her in another hug "Do me a favor, and don't let me go," she said returning the hug. "So what would you say about leaving here, getting some liquor that doesn't taste like socks, and having a never ending night cap on the beach?" "That sounds wonderful."

He bounded down the stairs reminding her a little of a puppy. "I found it. It was in my sock drawer." The doorbell rang. He opened it. A willowy burnette kissed him without saying a word. "Shirley said you'd be here. I just have to show you the invitations I found. They're perfect." Without skipping a beat, she turned to Margaret. "Hello, you must be Margaret. I'm Teresa, Hawkeye's fiancé." Her heart sank. That woman was not only the future Mrs. Pierce, she looked like she could have stepped out of a fashion magazine. She didn't stand a chance. "Fiance, well, it seems like there are certainly a lot of those in Crabapple. If you will excuse me. Captain, I'm leaving." "Margaret wait." It was too late for explanations as she walked out the door. "Teresa, we have to have a talk."

You've built a love but that love falls apart.  
Your little piece of heaven turns too dark.

"I take it you found out about Teresa," Shirley said, as she saw Margaret. "Shirley, you've been very kind, but I have to leave," she insisted. "You aren't letting that little piece of fluff scare you away now?" "Shirley, she's going to be his wife. He fell for her, and asked her to share his future." "The way she tells it." "What do you mean?" "Let's have a piece of my Dutch Apple Pie, and I'll share with you what's been going on since Hawkeye came home."

"Teresa had her eye on Hawkeye since they were in high school," Shirley began as they started to dig into the pie. "When Hawkeye came home from Korea, you were all he talked about, but Teresa paid it no mind. He was very confused, not sure what he wanted. Now I don't know what exactly went on to provoke this wedding, but Margaret, he lost all thought of her when you walked through that door. His daddy told me he hasn't seen him that happy since before he went to Korea." "He's getting married." "Yes, but if you ask me, it ain't to the right girl." "What do you mean?" "Teresa's into fancy living, she's been pressuring Hawkeye to go straight to one of those big city hospitals where he'd make more money. She's been trying to change him to the point that I sometimes wonder if she don't see him as some kind of project. I can tell you love him just the way he is. You're just like him. The kind of can appreciate the simple life just as well as the fancy, and you love Hawkeye just the way he is." "I have to leave

Listen to your heart  
when he's calling for you.

She bolted upright in bed. It was the same dream again. What does it mean she wondered as her gaze wandered out the window. 'You love Hawkeye just the way he is,' Shirley's voice echoed in her mind. 'What about Teresa?' Margaret wondered. Did Hawkeye really love Teresa enough to marry her? Was Margaret merely a distraction, or was there something more? As she looked out at the moon, she decided she needed answers. Answers she could only get from Hawkeye.

Listen to your heart  
there's nothing else you can do.

She quietly dressed, and went for a drive. Every passing minute was more excruciating

I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye.

She drove to his house and parked in the shadows underneath a tree. The porch light was on, and she noticed that Hawkeye and Teresa sat talking. Teresa fell against his shoulder, and Hawkeye kissed her. That was enough for Margaret. She couldn't take anymore. She drove back to Shirley's house, and started to pack.

Teresa fell against Hawkeye's shoulder with a sigh. "What happened to us,Hawkeye?" she asked. "We grew up, I got sent to Korea, you wound up in Manhattan. We lead different lives now." She stood up. "Goodbye Hawkeye," she said, giving him a kiss. "Goodbye Teresa."

"Landsakes girl. You weren't thinking about leaving without telling old Shirley now were you?" "I wanted to wait until you were up. I didn't mean to wake you." "Nothing to it. I usually get up with the roosters anyway. Let me fix you some coffee before you leave."

Sometimes you wonder if this fight is worthwhile.  
The precious moments are all lost in the tide, yea.  
They're swept away and nothing is what is seems,  
the feeling of belonging to your dreams.

Listen to your heart  
when he's calling for you.  
Listen to your heart  
there's nothing else you can do.  
I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye.

Her car flew along the road. She had to get out of Maine. She went faster as though she could leave behind the deamons that were chasing her. His car sped right past hers. The shock caused her to push the brake slightly. There was no telling what he might do. He parked his car so it blocked the entire road. Her car halted just before the collision point. She got out. "Are you crazy?" she demanded. "You came after the truth," he said tersely, his eyes blazed hot with determination, "and you're not leaving until you get it. The whole truth."

And there are voices that want to be heard.  
So much to mention but you can't find the words.

"I loved Teresa, but she loved the Hawkeye that exsisted in high school when the dirtiest thing I could actually get away with was peeking in the locker room. We grew up, grew apart, and I fell in love with someone else." The look in his eyes made her catch her breath.

The scent of magic, the beauty that's been  
when love was wilder than the wind

"I love you Margaret. Come live in Maine. You know we can make this work." "Hawkeye, are you sure it's what you want?" "Let me put it this way. I know for sure that the one person I want next to me every morning when I wake up is you. I know without a doubt, the mother I want for my children someday is you. I know that The woman that holds my heart is you. The only thing that could change that would be what you want." "You're not talking about just living together, it sounds like you're talking about a lifetime," she breathed. "Yeah, so what do you say?" "I think we may need more than a lifetime." He picked her up, spinning her around in circles. The look in his eyes said it all.

.  
Listen to your heart  
when he's calling for you.  
Listen to your heart  
there's nothing else you can do.  
I don't know where you're going  
and I don't know why,  
but listen to your heart  
before you tell him goodbye.


End file.
